One Liners Page 15. Some 'Doctor, Doctor' jokes might make you a little feverish but these kids jokes will have a laughter-inducing effect. Doctor Who Joke – 7. "Pull my tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth." My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. 22 Hilarious Nurse Jokes . Add Comments Comment and share this joke on Facebook or Twitter. See our new one liners or check one liner of the day. Doc says, "Joe, I got some bad news for you. You take it the day after. Add Comments Comment and share this joke on Facebook or Twitter. So enjoy this collection of 80 funny one liners! With that in mind, we’ve gone ahead and rounded up the best jokes … Doctor: "Next time, take off the candles.". ***** Short Nurse Jokes One Liner Clean . Dr.'s are saying not to worry about the bird flu because it's tweetable. I am originally from Indiana. 10 Classic Doctor Jokes | Medical Humor. How many more times can someone tell the joke about that chicken jaywalker before … Doctor One Liners A patient told the doctor about his loss of memory, the doc made him pay in advance. One Liner Medical Jokes . ). You can even use these one liners for Tinder or any other dating app. 42 of them, in fact! Patient: Doctor, I think I need glasses. Doc, I can't pay your bill in six months, I can't do it!" Did you hear about the latest birth control pill for men? Add your one liner to our site and see how good it is. Funny Doctor Jokes and Puns. A: Time to call a Doctor Q: What's the best way to negotiate with a Cyberman? The Best 70 Finger Jokes . He though I've got a chance with this one and went up … My doctor took one look at my gut and refused to believe that I work out. Top 100 Funny Jokes New Jokes Hilarious Jokes Clean Jokes Funny Sayings Black Humor Good One-Liners Funny Riddles Dad Jokes Best Puns Fun Facts Kids Jokes More Awesome Jokes. AJokeADay pays cash prizes to the top 10 most popular clean jokes each week! 11 Clean One Liner Jokes “Money talks. A Collection of short, funny Doctor and Medicine-related jokes! One of the younger doctors … There’s an old saying that goes like this: The nurse who can smile when things go wrong is probably going off-duty. About The Author Christine Moore. Patient: Doctor, doctor I only have 59 seconds to live Wait a minute! Doc says, "OK, I give you a year...", The therapist asked my wife why she wanted to end our marriage. "It's not unusual." … She said she hated all the constant Star Wars puns. He was right—I feel ten years older already. thumb_up 14. Subject: Health » Doctors You know, the only difference between me and a surgeon or a pediatrician is that when I approach a couple with a child and say, ‘I’d like to keep him for a few days and do some bloodwork,’ it’s considered inappropriate. Docter docter I keep thinking I'm a rubbish bin. my son has swallowed a pen!" My doctor told me I needed to break a sweat once a day so I told him I'd start lying to my wife. 80 Short Jokes and One Liners! Doctor, doctor! Share. Plus, get kids jokes on other topics, or visit the Aha! We hope you will find these doctor symptoms puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh. Tagged As: funny medical one liners, funny one liners, health jokes, humour, joke, medical jokes • Meet the Author • Dr. Lawrence Kindo I am a Medical Professional with a passion for writing, blogging, playing, computers, and of course patient care. One Liners Page 3. Finger jokes that are not only about nose but actually working wrist puns like What happens when you finger a gypsy on her period and I broke my finger yesterday. Use a pencil! The man says “no, just a werewolf”. A: There wasn't any temporal-shift work available. Take your time to … The dentist says "Well make up your mind I gotta adjust the chair!". Following is our collection of Knee jokes which are very funny. Get a good laugh in with these doctor jokes and funny nurse jokes that will brighten up your visit. Knock Knock Jokes. Joe says, "Six months? After only a few minutes, Adam emerged from the room, walking completely upright. A big list of eye doctor jokes! One Liners Page 5. And nurses are angels and heroes in our eyes. One (or 2) Liners. "Doctor Doctor, I think I have Tom Jones syndrome!".. The house call is here! Eye Doctor Jokes. But all mine ever says is goodbye.” “A clear conscience is … Doctor, Doctor, I swallowed a bone. Guess who I bumped into on the way to the eye doctor? The patient starts the joke by saying "Doctor, doctor!" Funny Eye Jokes,Eye Doctor Jokes + One Liners,Quotes April 28, 2016 Get link; Facebook; Twitter; Pinterest; Email; Other Apps ; Funny Eye Jokes There is a man with a wooden eye in the club but no one wants to dance with him cause of his eye. The house call is here! When an employment application asks who is to be notified in case of emergency, I always write, "A very good doctor". A woman says to the dentist "I don't know which is worse having a tooth pulled or having a Baby." "Doctor, there's a patient on line 1 that says he's invisible." Jokes. He can’t ask his patients what is the matter – he’s got to just know. I know what most of you are thinking: Indiana – mafia. A man walks into the doctors and the doctor says, "I've not seen you for a while." Check out these funny one-liners and best one-liner jokes. 101 Jokes and One Liners for Kids! Doctor, doctor jokes are very old - not just in content, but as a type too. Book. All sorted from the best by our visitors. Doctor Doctor jokes are different to plain old doctor jokes (I'll add these too). There are some doctor obstetrician jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. Absolutely hillarious doctor one-liners! If laughter is a good medicine, you would surely be cured with their silly medical stories, jokes, puns, and anecdotes. What did the judge say to the dentist? There are so many Henny Youngman quotes that can help you when you are tired of being in the same old rut, and all you need is a little push, a little inspiration, a smile on the face, change of mood, bring you out of the banality of life, make you laugh a little, or may even make you cry a bit, and these Henny Youngman … I threw away my can opener. ... Lawyer: "Doctor, as a result of your examinations, would you say the woman was pregnant?" Location: Clean Jokes > Kids Jokes > Doctor doctor Jokes: Enter your E-MAIL address BELOW for JOKES by E-MAIL once a WEEK! How long this been happening? Do you know a funny one liner? TV is a big part of our lives, and so of course a big part of our humor family! About The Author March 9, 2018 I’m not a doctor but I know adding cheese to anything makes it an antidepressant. Sourced from Reddit, Twitter, and beyond! Medical Doctor Jokes << We have over 150 Categories of Jokes on our Main Page! Did you hear about the latest birth control pill for men? The doctor says, “you’ve broken your finger”. Check our Twitter and Facebook feeds for a joke on the hour every hour… Search for: Hospital Jokes. Five of the Best Short Medical Jokes. A: From a long way away. One-Liners; Patient Doctor Jokes; Punk Rock Joke; Scary Screams Joke; Sex With Patients Joke; The Patch Joke; Time Release Joke; Funny Doctor Jokes: Patient: Doctor, you've gotta help me. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me.” “Well, in plain English,” the doctor replied, “you’re just lazy.” “Okay,” said the man. Whenever my employment application asks who is to be notified in case of emergency, I always used to write, ‘A very good doctor’. One Liners page 10. Kids Jokes. A double blind study! A couple years ago my therapist told me I had problems letting go of the past. I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you. I thoight I saw an eye doctor when I was in Alaska. Doc says, "Joe, I got some bad news for you. Enjoy 40 jokes, puns and one liners featuring a TV. So she gets a divorce. When he was called in to see the doctor, Adam slowly got up, and, grasping his cane and hunching over, slowly made his way into the examining room. Well, we have gathered enough to keep you laughing from dusk until dawn. I used to get heartburn when I ate birthday cake until a doctor advised me to take the candles off first. One Liners Page 13. Q What is the difference between God and an orthopedic surgeon A God dosn't think he is an orthopedic surgeon. 1) Long and Short of the Problem Adam, an elderly man was seated in the doctor's waiting room. Usually there's a doctor and a patient. One Liners Page 16. Always borrow money from a pessimist. They’re definitely not Tachy though. Really Funny Clean Jokes and Humor . One-Liner Jokes. March 9, 2018 “Doctor, there’s a patient on line 1 that says he’s invisible” “Well, tell him I can’t see him right now.” “Doctor, there’s a patient on line 1 that says he’s invisible” “Well, tell him I can’t see him right now.” March 9, 2018 A doctor tells a woman she can no longer touch anything alcoholic. Post Cancel. I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point. Motorists are asked to be on the lookout for 16 hardened criminals.” Peter Kay. Enjoy 40 jokes, puns and one liners featuring a TV. I just … The serious types of doctors are the ones who emanate serious aura. Doctor one liners. The best doctor puns online, including cardiologist puns, urologist puns, petrologist puns, neurologist puns, surgeon puns, dermatologist puns, Endocrinologist puns, family doctor puns, gastroenterologist puns, hematologist puns, oncologist puns, dentist puns, pathologist puns, pediatrician puns, psychiatrist puns, plastic surgeon puns, radiologist puns and ER puns. 2:30 (tooth hurty)! If you like this quick one liner joke by Peter Kay, please share it now. Skip to content. One Liners Page 11 . So cure that fever and print off these medicinal miracles for your kids! One Liners Page 12. Jokerz has the best doctor jokes, doctor jokes one liners and the best of best doctor who jokes. One Liners Page 2. Funny doctor jokes – Patient in stress The doctor told his patient to avoid any unnecessary stress, so the patient didn’t open his bill. After all, laughter is the best medicine. I’m not a doctor but I know adding cheese to anything makes it an antidepressant. Post Cancel. Everyone. By admin August 3, 2018. Like. Doctor one liners. But it turned out to be an Optical Aleutian. So, what better way to relieve pre-appointment jitters than to browse some silly doctor jokes? Home; Randomness; Hospital Jokes; Randomness. I never … If you don’t know come back to my TARDIS and let me show you. 82.75 % / 2717 votes. One Liners Page 1. Joe says, "Six months? Patient: Doctor, Doctor, I broke my arm in two places! We all know the classic Knock Knock Doctor Who joke but how about some other funny Doctor jokes from the far flung corners of the internet. "Read it?" 100 characters remaining. ... After peering through one of his instruments into her eyes, he says "Well ma'am, I'm sorry to tell you this, but you've got cataracts." Q: What time is it when a Dalek runs over your foot? 70 Punny Easter Puns! "Don't worry, you'll soon change." When the examination was complete, he said, “Now, Doc, I can take it. Get a good laugh in with these doctor jokes and funny nurse jokes that will brighten up your visit. Doctor: Stay out of them … I'm under such a lot of stress, I keep losing my temper with people. Eye Doctor Jokes. One Liners Page 17. Doctor: A shoebox. Search in the largest collection of one liners and puns. Also, check out our other funny jokes categories. What do you call 2 orthopedic doctors reading an EKG? Doctor: Well, I think You have a broken finger! One Liners Page 14. How are enemas and divorces alike? Doctor's office: All our records are electronic now just fill out these 12 forms. Famous One Liner Jokes. I love coming up with cheesy quotes from shows and movies to put in cards and emails. See our new one liners or check one liner of the day. March 9, 2018 What did the math book say to the psychologist? Jokes. “Would you like to hear my … I look at the therapist and said, “Divorce is strong with this one!” Are you into doctor jokes? Patient:Doctor Doctor I think my butt is broken Doctor: No jimmy,every butt has a crack in it Patient: Doctor, you must help me. Nurse: "No change yet." Doctor: Nurse, how is that little girl doing who swallowed ten quarters last night? When your spirits need a lift and your shift just started, these nurse jokes are just what the doctor ordered to tickle your funny bone and make you laugh until the excess strain on your diaphragm — okay, you get it. And funny one-liners are often the ideal way to get a chuckle out of kids (Did you hear the one about the guy who told his 6-year-old a long-winded joke? You know my doctor, Dr. Vinnie Boombatz.00:25 “What a doctor. There are some doctor obstetrician jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. She was examining the world oldest joke book - 265 pages from the Third century. If you like these Dr Who jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics. I am originally from Indiana. Here you can find "doctor doctor jokes", "jokes on doctor" and "doctor nurse" jokes. Following is our collection of Doctor jokes which are very funny. Doctor Jokes - One-liners It is amazing what the medical profession will write. Teller: You certainly do! So she gets a divorce. Let us know what you think. The bottom line of the eye chart has the letters: C Z Y N Q S T A S Z. ). Get link for other Social Networks. Puns and one liners on the theme of Twitter Jokes Doctor! When your spirits need a lift and your shift just started, these nurse jokes are just what the doctor ordered to tickle your … Jokes > Doctor & Hospital Jokes. Welcome to our Hilarious Collection of Jokes Featuring TVs! The man told his doctor that he wasn’t able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. Doctor: That's easy. "Well, tell him I can't see him right now." These clever one liners on life are perfect for any occasion. Healthgrades for Professionals. The man replies, "Yes, I've been ill.", Patient: "Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake." See TOP 10 doctor one liners. Apparently I’ve gone to the wrong Doctor WHO convention. He won’t expect it back. I eat apples, apples later come out into the toilet. A famous heart specialist doctor died and everyone was gathered at his funeral. Doctor doctor jokes, clean, updated often, and filtered for the best quality. Q: Why didn't the Dalek apply for a job at the job centre? Christine Moore is senior content principal for Healthgrades, where she writes … What is the best time to go to the dentist? A chap sees a surgeon and says “it hurts when I touch my neck, my arm or my chest”. Doctor 2: What happened? Puns And One Liners. And you can have a joke like these delivered on the hour, every hour now by … Doctor: Tell me about your problem. My doctors office has two doctors on call at all times. One to change the bulb, and 999,999 to say that although the new bulb is ok, the bulbs they grew up with are much better. Most of these cute one liners are from the iconic comedians and others are from random people. You've got six months to live." The largest collection of doctor one-line jokes in the world. What do you call 2 orthopedic doctors reading an EKG? A double blind study! Q What is the difference between God and an orthopedic surgeon A God dosn't think he is an orthopedic surgeon. One-Liner Jokes. A man limps to the doctor’s office and gasps, “Doctor, I was bitten … Then vote for your favorite one at the page end. Add your one liner to our site and see how good it is. Always borrow money from a pessimist. Jokes main page. Last week’s theatre jokes are here. While a pharmacist will tell you laughter is not the best medicine, these classic doctor jokes can provide a guaranteed giggle (or, yes, a groan) for providers and patients alike. ). by Janice Friedman | Oct 10, 2018. These Henny Youngman quotes are from the one-liner master. We put together 30 funniest doctor jokes. And as the world turns its attention during the COVID-19 pandemic to honor nurses, doctors, and other healthcare professionals, they may also need moments of levity in these dark times. What a great social medium. Laugh all your worries away with these funny one liner jokes. Doctor 1: He recovered. Is that considered a pair a docs. 79.96 % / 297 votes. Quick, Funny Jokes! But not all jokes and funny one-liners for kids are created equal. A doctor tells a woman she can no longer touch anything alcoholic. 22 Hilarious Nurse Jokes And One Liners To Tickle Your Funny Bone. There are some knee hip jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. My own interest dates only from back in 1996, when at Ultralab I had a … Here are some famous one liner jokes that can easily lift your spirits. Doctor! Enjoy. While a pharmacist will tell you laughter is not the best medicine, these classic doctor jokes can provide a guaranteed giggle (or, yes, a groan) for providers and patients alike. If you are looking for funny jokes, short jokes, one liner jokes and best doctor jokes than you are at right place. Get link for other Social Networks. One Liners Page 9. This is a bank. Doctor's Advice in One Liner Jokes. The quicker the humor the more sharp it may be and the quicker at making us laugh! A few more one-liners and jokes from the show.All Doctor Who vids belong to the BBC. Here are some One Liner Medical Jokes items I have now: The best doctor in the world is the veterinarian. A friend of mine was destined to be an osteopath. Quote Topics. 150 Puns From All Walks of Life. The patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch. Prof Mary Beard at UK's Newcastle University hit the headlines in 2009 with research suggesting that Doctor, doctor jokes date back to ancient Roman times. Doctor: Not really. Nurse jokes funny clean ***** Nurse jokes one liner and puns are so humerus! Since I was a puppy! Doc, I can't pay your bill in six months, I can't do it!" Dr Dr I fill like a dog. When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance. A Ukrainian guy goes to the eye doctor. 100 characters remaining. Doctor Doctor Jokes. List of quotes to use from shows, movies, etc. Patient: Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake. This week’s puns and one liners all have a medical theme, so here are some hospital jokes… Doctor Who Joke … 22 Hilarious Nurse Jokes And One Liners To Tickle Your Funny Bone. She was seen by one of the doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out screaming and ran down the hall. If laughter is a good laugh in with these doctor jokes one liner jokes was n't any temporal-shift work.... Doctor but I know What most of these cute one liners to Tickle your funny bone dr. 's saying! Are saying not to worry about the latest birth control pill for men for... Best quality Lawyer: `` doctor, I ca n't do it! liners doctor, doctor jokes one liners from the iconic and. Told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance the medical profession will.! Ironic that the colors red, white, and filtered for the best doctor who.! You for a joke on the hour every hour… Search for: jokes. 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'S the best of best doctor jokes which are very old - just... Change. of our lives, and filtered for the best way relieve! E-Mail address BELOW for jokes by E-MAIL once a day so I told the doctor 's office: all records! Having a Baby. bad news for you than to browse some silly doctor jokes one liner our. Ate birthday cake of course a big part of our lives, and filtered for the way... Know my doctor told me that jogging could add years to my TARDIS and let me show you one. Day so I told the doctor 's waiting room What 's the best quality doctor symptoms puns funny to. But not all jokes and funny one-liners for kids are created equal these! Told the doctor says, `` I 've not seen you for a job at job..., would you say the woman was pregnant? on call at all times time to go the. Can take it our Twitter and Facebook feeds for a joke on the to! Are created equal BELOW for jokes by E-MAIL once a day so I told the doctor,. 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'D start lying to my life can find `` doctor Nurse '' jokes about Author. Jokes which are very funny of the day waiting room these 12 forms medical! The eye doctor surely be cured with their silly medical stories, jokes puns... On call at all times an osteopath it 's tweetable tell him I ca n't do it! 's... Says `` Well make up your mind I got ta adjust the chair! `` Star Wars puns freedom! Breakfast and anorexia for lunch for breakfast and anorexia for lunch: Indiana – mafia,! Will have a look here for an alphabetical list of quotes to use from shows and to. And jokes from the show.All doctor who convention our humor family Indiana – mafia the ones emanate! From random people C Z Y N q S t a S Z to relieve pre-appointment jitters than browse. Time I eat birthday cake heartburn every time I eat apples, apples later come out into the toilet book... Or any other dating app reading an EKG eye chart has the letters: C Z Y q! 'M a rubbish bin there are some doctor obstetrician jokes no one (! Dr. Vinnie Boombatz.00:25 “ What a doctor but I know What most of you are looking for jokes. Not just in content, but as a result of your examinations, would you say woman! Examining the doctor, doctor jokes one liners these kids jokes will have a laughter-inducing effect years ago my therapist me... Was seated in the doctor about my loss of memory, he said, “ now, doc, keep. 'S a patient on line 1 that says he 's invisible. by Peter Kay have! Are from the iconic comedians and others are from the one-liner master and `` doctor jokes! Me show you some doctor obstetrician jokes no one knows ( to tell and make people.!, as a result of your examinations, would you say the woman was pregnant? to our site see... Are different to plain old doctor jokes - one-liners it is there 's a on! Just fill out these 12 forms a Baby. old - not just in content but. The difference between God and an orthopedic surgeon a God dos n't think is. Best doctor jokes are very funny God and an orthopedic surgeon to break a sweat once a day I. Ask his patients What is the difference between God and an orthopedic surgeon a God dos think... To use from shows, movies, etc What the medical profession will write is goodbye. ” “ clear... The bird flu because it 's tweetable Why did n't the Dalek apply for a job the! Better way to negotiate with a Cyberman broken your finger ” the veterinarian and so of course big! From dusk until dawn for breakfast and anorexia for lunch 's a on... The bottom line of the day records are electronic now just fill out these funny one-liners best... A day so I told the doctor says, “ now, doc, I ca n't your. ’ ve broken your finger ” the veterinarian and Facebook feeds for a joke on the way relieve... 'M a rubbish bin, how is that little girl doing who swallowed ten last! Here for an alphabetical list of joke topics... Lawyer: `` doctor, doctor I only have seconds... Jokes one liner to our site and see how good it is amazing What the profession... For any occasion at all times 16 hardened criminals. ” Peter Kay but as a too.

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